So, I suppose you can guess what is on my heart today. Eden knew like my other children that the kids were all going to be okay!! Yet, she went off the deep end the other night. It was one of the worst episodes we have had with her. Heart and gut wrenching!
Today I was on the ONE THANKFUL MOM blog and was encouraged that we are not alone. They have a daughter who has been removed from their home to get extra treatment / help. She said, "It is important to remember the core of our children's behavior is FEAR."
Fear drives the chaotic behaviors we have seen in our home!!
There was also one other thing she shared that has stayed with me. "What causes us the most pain, is our child's suffering combined with the suffering of our other children. It's like a swirling cloud of pain moving through our home."
AMEN. AMEN. I could so relate and I felt thankful for her sharing the honest truth because I know we are not alone!!
It is this fear / worry/ anxiety that I have been thinking on with Eden. What produces it and how can I stop it from spiraling out of control?!! I realize as Eden's parent that I cannot control what she worries about and in providing a safe and loving environment it is not always enough.
This is a picture for those of you who don't understand and only see the smiling Eden.
| Eden |
| worry |
| fear |
| anxieties |
| driving her.... |
I debated on posting these. No, she doesn't look very happy, does she? She is a broken child and sometimes I feel the need to show people real! This is what adoption can look like. It is hard and it isn't fair!
| On a happy note, who is that little guy finishing up his job with a happy smile?!! |
8 comments:
We've been in a very rough place with our Missy, too, this week. I guess I commented on One Thankful Mom.... Prayers for your Eden.
I read some of that blog too. it is so hard what those kids have gone through...thinking of you guys!
It can't be easy, but what would that poor child do/be without you??
It's always good yo know we r not alone! Thanks!
Brenda, thanks for that reminder! I think about it & I know she would be a very very angry & hurt & confused child with no comfort whatsoever!
Praying for you tonight. Love to your family!
Yes...great post. We are learning more about the anxiety & fear cycle (and how it drives negative behavior). Honestly, we've had no reason to learn it before now! Although much of what we are learning can also be helpful to our typically-developing kids. It's so hard and heart-breaking to get a glimpse into their little hearts...to find out what they are thinking about (and feeling fear/anxiety over). : ( Hugs.
Could you include a link for the blog you were mentioning (One Helpful Mom)?
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